Quick factoid: The ignition temperature of Methane is 630° C and a Butane flame burns at 1,970° C, thus when a blast of Methane gas comes in contact with a Butane flame a fireball proportional to the volume of the quantity of Methane will ensue.

This factoid was inspired by a recent experience of yours truly (and his brother...) - which I won't describe on this blog.

I know, this post was juvenile. I haven't posted all week because it's been the only thing in my head to post about (I don't multitask well). Posting a truncated version of what I had originally planned was in the hopes of keeping reader offence to a minimum.

I do think that this type of humour is universal on at least some level. My sons spent several minutes today blowing "raspberries" into Lindsay's belly simply because they enjoyed the sound.

There are few things in life as funny as a toddler grinning from ear to ear and giggling at the sound that he was just able to mimic using nothing but his lips and mommy's belly.

I just typed out 17 pages of manual.

My aching fingers (see previous post) cannot handle much more in the way of blog entries tonight.

Well, maybe one quick preschoolerism:

The newest veggie tales contains a silly song with Larry entitled "The Gated Community"

I had a rather difficult time at supper trying to convince said preschooler that he *HAD* to pronounce the T-E-D part of the word gated in order for the context of the song to be maintained...

Q: What do masking tape, a door and 2nd degree burns have in common?

A: Gather 'round children as I regale you with the tale of "Ben's Obsessive Need For a Quiet Office".

Not all humorous stories in the Inkster household come from our two youngsters. Not by a long shot. Some even stem from those of us that call ourselves "responsible adults". This evening I decided that my office was not yet silent enough (even after installing the sound absorbing insulation). This decision prompted me to seek out the source of the sound leakage.

My search led me to the door.

The audiophiles in the audience will have already recognized that the door is a key component in a sound proof room. It is generally recommended to get either an external door (that's insulated) or a heavy, solid wood door. Whichever option that you should choose, you absolutely must have a seal in the air gap to prevent the sound from escaping (or entering as the case may be).

I'm pretty sure that my door is made of solid wood. Balsa wood.

As I do not have a spare door kicking around ("Hey Lindsay, have you seen that spare steel door?"...), I decided to do the next best thing and seal the door.

What works best to seal a door you ask?

I have no idea. But, I'm not afraid to try new ideas.

I tried masking tape. After about twenty minutes and an entire roll of the stuff I noticed that I still had an air gap of about a quarter of an inch. Also, I ran out of tape. No good.

Hmmmmm....

Inspiration struck! I could use hot glue to create a seal. Perfect.

So, I ran (not far... like about 5 steps) into the storage room to seek Lindsay's hot glue gun. After much rummaging, I remembered that it was in the desk right next to the door.

I don't know how many husbands out there actually keep close tabs on their wife's crafting materials, but I'm not one of them.

There it was at the back of the drawer, glowing in the pearlescent light shone down from on high like a sign from Heaven (or maybe just the fluorescent lighting in the basement). I pulled it out and realized that I would need more than the half glue stick that was loaded into the thing. So, back to the storage room...

... rummaging here for about 5 minutes ...

Back to the drawer. There were the extra glue sticks ... under the glue gun. Apparently I'm blind (but clever as our story will tell...)

Yes, now I was ready. I plugged the gun into the wall and waited for the glue to warm.

... time passed ...

The glue was liquid, the time had come. I closed the door and began to run a bead of glue down the crack on the hinge side of the door. Slowly, carefully, using about 400 glue sticks (give or take). I let the glue dry, then opened the door. Well, I tried to open the door. I had to give it quite the shove with my shoulder as I had just *GLUED MY DOOR SHUT*.

Man, I'm so smart. I suspect that I should have thought of that beforehand.

I did manage to get the door open with a tremendous snapping as the glue came unstuck and yes, the air gap was sealed. Victory!

Did it block the sound?

Well ... No, it didn't.

Hmmmm.....

Ah, yes. The top of the door had an air gap of about a quarter of an inch as well.

"I've done this before, I can do it again", I thought to myself and brandished my glue gun with the glowing red tip.

And before you can say, "DEAR MOTHER THAT HURTS", I was pumping searing hot glue into the crack just over my eye level.

I had nearly completed the job when an innocent little drizzle of glue fell from the tip of the gun onto my outstretched ring finger on my right hand. Don't ask me why it was sticking out, or even how I did it - have you ever tried to stick out *only* your ring finger? It's nearly impossible. In any case, the nerve endings in this unobtrusive digit began sending urgent messages to my brain at this point.

Did I scream out? Did I curse the day I was born? Did unwholesome words escape my lips?

No.

I held my tongue. In Proverbs, Solomon admonishes us with the phrase "Even a fool is counted wise if he keeps silent..." (see Proverbs 17:28)

Instead, I calmly wiped the glue away with my other hand.

Those of you who are "crafty" will recognize the folly of this reaction. Better to scream once and be done with it. Now three fingers and the palm of my left hand were beginning to send the aforementioned urgent signals to the brain.

Quote from the scene:

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!"

So, is the door sealed? Does sound leak? Is my lair completely sound proof?

Who cares.

I hurt. I'm going to end my story and go soak my blistering fingers in cold water.

I am a Skype convert as of today.

A fellow that I work with suggested that we begin to communicate over skype rather than the phone so that we can pass files and URLs and such back and forth. The final goal, I think, is to eliminate the need to leave the (sound proof) basement for meetings.

So, I dutifully installed the software and was instantly hooked. (I've become a zealot - I've converted two other guys that I work with...)

I have used MSN messenger for many years for all of my Instant Messaging needs, but the ease of use, sound and video quality of skype converted me. I immediately went to Future Shop and purchased a new webcam and microphone.

The other really cool feature with skype is the fact that it can interface with real telephones. So, if I want make a tech support call for some of my software to a user in the United Kingdom it costs me €0.017/Minute. This works out to 2.4ish Cents a minute in Canadian Dollars. Woo Hoo!!!

Conversely, if I want to have a phone number in the U.K. where my clients can get ahold of me, then I can set one up for €30.00/Year plus the airtime costs (€ 0.017/min) . This dramatically opens up possibilities for my business.

Skype Rocks.

Right now I am sitting in my "Lair" (my isolated home office with no sunlight) in beautiful, silent bliss.

Yesterday, I installed some sound dampening insulation between me and the rest of the house. This stuff is incredible. If one of the kids drops something heavy directly above my head, I'll hear the vibration through the floor joists, but apart from that I'm cut off from the rest of the house. When we finish the rest of the basement, this is what we are going to use.

As a side note, I learned something interesting reading Lindsay's Blog entry for yesterday. Apparently, my new title is "safety conscious do-it-yourself-er" on account of my fancy safety glasses (which our preschooler went wobbly over...). This was a surprise to me because I had thought of myself as more of a "point and pay" kind of a guy - apparently I was wrong. ;-)

Here are some stats on the insulation for the sound-geeks out there:

ASTM C 423
CO-EFFICIENTS AT FREQUENCIES
0.52 - 125 Hz
0.96 - 250 Hz
1.18 - 500 Hz
1.07 - 1000 Hz
1.05 - 2000 Hz
1.05 - 4000 Hz
1.05 - NRC

From http://www.bobgolds.com/AbsorptionCoefficients.htm

0.00 = no absorption.
0.50 = 50% absorption.
1.00 = 100% absorption.

Measurements are done according to a standard test method such as ASTM C423 or ISO. "In some cases, the measured sound absorption coefficient is greater than 1.00. As recommended by the test method, these values are reported as measured and not adjusted.""Differences in coefficients of less than 0.15 are not significant."

A blog is supposed to be a place to jot down things that you are thinking about.

So, what am I thinking about? Well, I haven't posted for the last couple of days because my life has been a bit of a whirlwind. As a geek, most of that flurry of activity revolves (whirlwind reference) around writing and supporting software.

On Tuesday, I had a deadline to present a data model (in SQL) and prototype front end to the Glenmore Christian Academy Report Cards Application (in Java) - so Monday night was spent in Netbeans. My 3D Box Shot program (in Delphi) had two tenacious people post over the last three days to tell me of a problem with saving the images, and someone canceled an order (this is not good). Also, my Windows Interface (in C++) to Evtech's OHI began spewing pointer errors - but only on two machines - and I can't duplicate them. Finally, the Eluminor Web Application (in JSP) project switched graphing systems to more easily and succinctly display data - so I need to port the existing code base (in Java - they're servlets).

Man, I sound like I'm whining!

I am not seeking sympathy, I'm just trying to clear my head. When you work in five different languages in three days, your thought processes get a little cluttered.

I love what I do. Software development is much more than simply an exercise in logic. It involves a great deal of time management, people skills and some serious tenacity.

The more you learn about this stuff, the more you find you have yet to learn, the more you groan at the cocky remarks you made as a rookie.

Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall
- Proverbs 16:18

This post is simply to say that I blogged today.

That is all.

No words were harmed in the creation of this post.

This post was brought to you today by the number Π (3.1415926) and the letter Φ (Phi).

Tonight I get to provide the counterpoint to Lindsay's blog entry.

She mentions that this morning she pulled out a box of cereal called "Life" and then proceeds to talk about the thought process that this stimulated in her. What she fails to mention is that our Preschooler upon receiving his bowl of "Life" declared them "Shreddies" and would not stand to be corrected.

Kid's say the darnedest things, but they also draw from an adult's lips some pretty strange phrases. While Lindsay was pondering "Life", I was comparing and contrasting two different brands of cereal. "No, no, no...Shreddies is a darker brown and it has a finer weave..."

One more preschooler-ism.

This morning at the Good Friday service, the Pastor described how God's grace is something that we do not naturally look for. The quote was, "Even as children we are conditioned to expect a reward for good behavior. 'If you are good then you can have a timbit', our parents tell us". At this point (during a silent, pensive moment) our preschooler belts out "I'M GOOD!!!" - expecting the good graces of Tim Hortons.

Thursday night is Bible Study night at the Inkster household.

As a direct result, Thursday afternoon is a flurry of activity to prepare for said Bible Study. This activity includes such things as cleaning the house and writing the handout (I still haven't created one that's typo-free...) for the evening's lively discussion. This afternoon was no exception.

I will tell you that trying to glean insightful questions out of the pages of Deuteronomy while a vacuum scrapes all but the most microscopic dust bits from directly above your head (I work in the basement) is not the easiest thing in the world to do.

I do enjoy these studies though. We end up talking about the strangest things. A couple of weeks ago we had a lengthy discussion about the pros and cons of circumcision. This topic included an examination of the Levitical laws, the historical context and modern day Christian responsibilities. It was really interesting.

For any who may be interested, tonight marked the end of our 10 week study entitled "The Old Testament Challenge". I would highly recommend it to any Christian who wants to dig a little deeper into what they believe.

I really like Java. (The language, not the beverage...although I love the beverage too)

Having said that, let me state that Java is also the hardest language I've ever learned. I don't mean the syntax (it's a lot like C) but rather, the sheer depth of what it can do.

A huge quantity of my development time is spent on a project for a local company called Eluminor. The scope of this project is enormous, but the one thing that binds it all together is Java. Since I've worked on this project for quite some time (10 years...), I have had the opportunity to work on all of the major sections of it. I have learned through the process that it doesn't matter how much you know, you still know virtually nothing when it comes to development. Writing code for an embedded system does nothing to prepare you for creating an Enterprise Web Application.

Tonight I got something working for my little test Java application that I have wanted to for quite some time. Java Web Start. I can now click a link to an XML file on my web server and magically my application fires up on my desktop. (It still needs some work, 11 MB of JAR files is a little huge)

Here are a few links for the geeks out there:

JWS_White_Paper.pdf
developersguide.html

And this book has a single chapter that cleared it all up for me:


Here is his example of a Java Web Start Application:

Play The Simple Tile Game Now!

I'm SORRY!!!!

I missed yesterday's post. My consistency rating is shot. I'm scum, post-missing blog-scum. (It's actually a variety of pond scum as blog sounds like bog)

Enough self flagellation. On with today's post.

I recently got an invite to the illustrious ivory towers of Google's Analytics program and I set up the account yesterday. So far, I'm only tracking this site and the Blink Development site.

Now, I've used a pile of different web log analyzing software - everything from Power Phlogger to Webalizer - and Google Analytics is definitely the prettiest. However, sometimes the information that you receive on software like this leaves you scratching your head...

For example, according to "Google the Wise" I have received a total of 190 individual visits over the last two days. This is slightly lower than what my own server reports, but not too far off.

Of the 190 visits, again from the mouth of Google, 153 originate from the country of Iran.

Say what?

Apparently 80.526% of the visitors to my main business website come from cities whose names I cannot even pronounce properly - and I like big words. As a side note, what would someone from the region or city (I'm not sure which) of Chahar Mahall va Bakhtiari want to know about "Duplicating a hard disk using dd and ntfsresize"?

In summary, Google Analytics is very pretty but rather confusing.

Tonight is one of those nights where I don't have a clue what to write about. Also, every time I get about six words down I get interrupted...

This evening we had our Church's Annual General Meeting. It sounds like a crashing bore, but it was a pretty good time. We had dinner with the other church members and the various pastors gave reports on the ministries they are responsible for. (On a side note, it was very funny to see six pastors give "brief" summaries)

Here was another interruption. I apologize for the disjointed thoughts - Lindsay is working on our Condo Board's newsletter...

I would like to ask all of the sharp eyed readers of my blog to be on the lookout for my Bible. I think I left it under my chair at the Sunday morning service two weeks ago. This has been most distressing to me because it has not appeared in the lost and found or anywhere else. I have other Bibles, but this one is my Bible - you understand. Lindsay gave it to me for my 17th birthday. If you see it, please let me know.

I leave you with a fun, but nearly useless word:

Mitochondrion: any of various round or long cellular organelles of most eukaryotes that are found outside the nucleus, produce energy for the cell through cellular respiration, and are rich in fats, proteins, and enzymes called also chondriosome (Wikipedia Link)

I saw this the other day and thought, "Oh man, is that ever cool!"

However, this is the first opportunity to post about it. What I speak of is the Shadow Robot Company Air Muscle. These things are really something to see, if only because they are an interesting spin on something that you have seen a hundred times but never noticed.

The goal of a muscle (a Flexor) is to thicken and thus shorten to lift a load. That's why you bend your arm to show off your beefy bicep - it looks bigger because it's shorter.

So these air muscles are basically balloons that inflate and get shorter.

I hear you yawning out there. But take a look at what it can be used for. (Cool Video - Needs DivX)

This may or may not be a good blog entry, but it's all I've been thinking about today (well, I also saw a small hippo - but Lindsay already talked about that tonight).

Child Number One was spouting nonsense today.

Quite literally. As in we would be talking about something and he would shout out from the back seat of the van, "Nonsense!"

How do you react to a kid that uses grown up words and phrases like "indeed", "nonsense" and "speaking of which ..."?

My reaction is to try to teach him new and more interesting words. It's like a game of bigger and better. The conversation goes something like this:

Me: "Would you like a snack?"

Him: "Indeed."

Me: "Okay. Here's a sandwich. So, what's it called when the moon seems to be moving with you when you drive down the street?"

Him: "I don't know...cephalopod?" <- From a previous conversation

Me: "Close, but not quite. It's called parallax."

Him: "pair...a...wax"

Me: "Parallax - with a LLLL sound."

Him: "pair a wax"

Me: "Very good. Go tell your mom."

As a side note, I do not think that it is possible for geek parents to raise children without any geekiness. They may grow up to be the hip, groovy teenagers. However, I think it's way more likely that they will try to explain the general premise of special relativity to their Grade Three teachers and peers. I may be dooming my children to a view of the elementary hallways through the slats (air holes) of a locker, but I think it's worth it.

Just when you thought the blog could get no geekier - it does.

Q: How do you determine if an integer is a power of two simply by looking at it's bits?

A: f = !(v & (v - 1)) && v;

I love C.

Here's a page full of them: Bit Twiddling Hacks

That's all for now.

This morning I am brimming with paternal pride.

On Wednesday mornings, the boys and I hang out while Lindsay goes to piano lessons. We usually have "sword fights" or "drive cars" or something along those lines. This morning, however, yours truly was not feeling so hot (I have a wicked cold) and another activity had to be arranged.

Nothing makes you feel better when you have a cold than watching Captain James T. Kirk engage in fisticuffs with bad guys and explain what "love" is to the various alien babes.

Thus, the DVD was inserted into the notebook and all of the Inkster men gathered 'round.

My eldest son filled my heart with pride when he turned to me and asked, "Daddy, is that orange glowey ball Sargon?" - Yes my friends, he had identified the alien antagonist by name given nothing but a flashing light as a clue.

Ben Inkster = Proud Father

Second post of the day.

I spidered www.blink-shareware.com today to try to set up a large number of affiliate relationships with the software vendors in one shot.

This does not work.

Not only were there no new relationships, but RegNow banned my home IP address. Yikes!

The gentlemen at my ISP (nucleus) were able to set me up with a new IP address, so no great harm done. However, I don't think I'll try doing that again.

It sounds like a bad joke: How many men does it take to make a tin can telephone?

Apparently the answer is "more than three". How many more? Your guess is as good as mine. For bonus points, how impressed will a three-year-old boy be with said phone?

I won't regale you with the details, but the imagery is pretty good. Imagine three grown men playing with scissors, string (and then wire after the string didn't work), washers and a couple of tin cans for twenty minutes while the youngsters get grumpier and grumpier.

I consider myself a fairly smrt individual. However, the events of last night displayed for me in sharp detail that my calling has nothing to do with tin cans or string.

For quite some time now, I have pressed my wife Lindsay to set up a blog as she spends a fair amount of time on the computer and has some strong opinions about what she reads. This she did - at lindsayinkster.blogspot.com.

Once I saw her blog in all of it's glory (and edited the template HTML to make it look better), I felt a twinge of geek-envy. Why don't I set up a blog? Though I already have many websites to look after, I do not have one that I can simply vent my thoughts upon.

Thus, illegitimi non carborundum was born (April 2, 2006, 10:32 AM MST, 7lb 9oz, 18in long, Male?).

Lindsay said to me that she would nag me to keep posting as I am not terribly disciplined with this sort of a thing. I do have a binder of journal entries that I have made over the last two years or so. It consists of eight entries. For those out there doing the math, that adds up to "not consistent". The nagging should help.